The Devastating Fire I. Questions A. Why do we love gossip so much? B. What should we do when we hear gossip? II. Introduction A. Gossip "illustration" 1. Appeal of gossip 2. Many publications survive on it 3. Many do not see the problem with it B. Gossip is quite dangerous and devastating! 1. Many reputations have been tarnished and careers lost on account of gossip 2. Churches have split over it 3. Indeed, gossip is like a devastating fire C. James 3:2-12 1. Indication of the danger of the tongue 2. James refers to many things here, one of which surely is gossip, backbiting, and the like D. Let us consider the matter further from the Scriptures III. Terminology A. To what, precisely, do we refer? B. Many terms are used to describe the concept (definitions from Webster) 1. Gossip: One who runs from house to house, tattling and telling news; an idle tattler 2. Backbiter: One who slanders, calumniates or speaks ill of the absent 3. Busybody: A meddling person; one who officiously concerns himself with the affairs of others 4. Slander: A false tale or report maliciously uttered and tending to injure the reputation of another by lessening him in the esteem of his fellow citizens, by exposing man to impeachment and punishment, or by impairing his means of lining; defamation C. All of these concepts involve telling stories or tales about others 1. Slander, especially, refers to untrue stories or negative bias toward a story 2. Same is true of the other words... 3. ...but one can be a gossiper or backbiter or busybody while telling the "truth" D. Likewise, all the concepts involve someone who enjoys telling such stories for some reason 1. It may give them an "edge" over a competitor 2. They might be enjoying the downfall of another 3. They may like the "prestige" of being a hub of information and having people listen to them 4. It may give them purpose, or simply something to do! E. Now that we understand exactly that of which we speak, let us consider what the Scriptures say IV. The Scriptures on Gossip et al A. Let us begin with the New Testament B. Condemnations of busybodies 1. 2 Thessalonians 3:11 2. 1 Timothy 5:13 (the same equaled to a gossip) 3. Note that in both circumstances, indication that one becomes a busybody because one is not working or has nothing else to do! C. Also 2 Corinthians 12:20, 1 Peter 4:15 D. A difficulty also in the Old Testament 1. Leviticus 19:16 2. Psalm 15:3 3. Proverbs 11:9, 11:13, 20:19, 25:23 4. Ezekiel 22:9 E. We can see, therefore, that gossip, slander, backbiting, and being a busybody is quite condemned in the Scriptures V. What Can Be Done About Gossip A. Seeing, then, the difficulty regarding gossip, what can be done about it? 1. There are two different parts to this issue 2. When are you tempted to gossip, and what should you do? 3. What can be done if you are hearing gossip? B. Tempted to Gossip 1. What happens if you learn of something or see something that you could tell others? 2. First, is the story true or false? Have you addressed the matter with the person(s) whom it involves (Matthew 18:15-17)? 3. If you are not comfortable with that, is it worth addressing to the eldership? 4. Regardless of the veracity of the story, is it something that would lead people to think favorably or unfavorably toward the person(s) involved? 5. Philippians 4:8, Ephesians 4:29 6. If the matter warrants serious attention, address it with the person(s) involved and/or the eldership 7. If the matter is neutral or negative, what value is it to tell it to everyone? 8. If it is negative, it is likely gossip, and doubly condemned: one becomes a talebearer, and one also is not building up with his or her speech (Ephesians 4:29, 2 Thessalonians 3:11)! C. Hearing Gossip 1. Gossip thrives because it gets communicated over and over again 2. If you hear gossip, challenge the person spreading it 3. Be willing to ask if they have validated the information and have spoken to the person(s) involved (or the elders) regarding the matter 4. If they have not validated the information, ask why they are spreading stories that may not even be true and may represent slander, which is sin? 5. If they have not spoken to the person(s) involved or the elders regarding the matter, ask why they are not handling it the way God would have it handled (Matthew 18:15-18) 6. Even if they have validated the information and have addressed it with the person(s) involved, ask why they feel that it is necessary for anyone/everyone else to know it 7. Ask the person whether they would appreciate it if they were the subject of the gossip (Luke 6:31) 8. Let your displeasure regarding the sin of gossip be known! 9. It may be that your rebuke may lead the person to change: if nothing else, people will avoid coming to you with gossip, and it keeps you from temptation! D. Hearing of Matters of Sin 1. If the gossip you hear is of no real consequence and does not contain matters of sin, it is best to just leave it die 2. But what if we hear a report that someone has sinned? What should we do about it? 3. Our responsibility to our brethren demands that we do something! 4. We ought to speak to the person(s) involved, and inform them that we have heard a report that they are involved in the matter, and ask them to verify the information 5. This way, one is taking the situation to the source, to warn them regarding their sin per Matthew 18:15-18, or, if they are innocent of the charge, so that they may know that they are being maligned and slandered so that they can clear their name! 6. One could also speak to the elders about the matter 7. Regardless of what comes of it, you should also inform the gossiper about what you did and encourage them to handle the situation in a like manner the next time 8. The gossiper should also learn that it is still sinful to spread tales, even if they are true! E. In all circumstances, we need to work to end gossip VI. Gossip's Damage A. Gossip is extremely damaging! B. It is sin, and can condemn someone C. It also leads to many pains 1. It can ruin character 2. Careers can be lost because of it 3. It fosters an atmosphere of suspicion and a lack of trust 4. No one feels like they can say anything without it being known to everyone! D. Gossip can only hinder our attempts to grow together in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ, being one body of persons working together for the Gospel (2 Peter 3:18, Acts 2:42, etc.) VII. Conclusion A. We have seen much regarding gossip and its ilk B. We have seen that it does no good and much harm C. It is a cancer in any group D. We must do what we can to avoid it, and do right toward each other E. Let us not be gossips, but do what we can to speak with each other to build each other up! F. Invitation/songbook Scripture, Meditation, and Application 1: But now do ye also put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, railing, shameful speaking out of your mouth (Colossians 3:8). James warns us how the tongue can be a fire, and the blaze set forth by gossip, slander, and similar conversations. When we thus tell stories or speak evil of one another we hurt people and destroy relationships. Words are easily said but impossible to take back; relational damage might be healed but wounds will remain. Why are people so tempted to share gossip? 2: For we hear of some that walk among you disorderly, that work not at all, but are busybodies (2 Thessalonians 3:11). The Apostles had great concern regarding those who were not dutifully employed. They would go about as busybodies, doing nothing productive but spreading corrosive speech. The Apostles warned Christians solemnly to stay busy and resist the temptation to go and talk about people. Why would people say that idle hands are the Devil's workshop? 3: He that goeth about as a tale-bearer revealeth secrets; But he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth a matter (Proverbs 11:13). Gossip is very tempting to spread; we like to be the ones who are in the know, and to be valued by others because of what we know. We may take exquisite pleasure in news that makes others look worse and for us to look better. Yet we have all sinned; we all are dependent on the grace and mercy of the Lord Jesus. Our value is not in the stories about others we can tell. We do better to let whatever stories we hear end with us. How can we resist the temptation to spread gossip? 4: "And if thy brother sin against thee, go, show him his fault between thee and him alone: if he hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother" (Matthew 18:15). What should be done when gossip is spread? If there is an offense and transgression which should be addressed, the one against whom the sin was committed should speak to the offender to try to reconcile. Accusations should otherwise only be received with two or three witnesses. We ought to display concern in preserving each other's honor and to work to build relationships, not carelessly destroy them. How can we work to build up relationships and not tear them down?