Finding Ourselves I. Introduction A. One of the recent fads in the self-help world is the "need" we all have to "go" and "find yourself" B. This is not at all the idea that we are somehow lost or something of the sort C. The idea is that we must go through various experiences to determine who we really are D. What shall we say regarding these things? Do we need to go and find ourselves? E. What do the Scriptures have to say? F. Let us investigate these matters II. What Do We Seek to Find? A. What, really, are we seeking to "find"? B. The idea of "finding yourself" is really a search for identity and meaning C. Humans have struggled and continue to struggle to have an idea of who they are and why they are here D. Identity: Who Am I? 1. The question of who am I is quite important 2. We live in a world where we often feel like a number; someone who is not very distinct from others 3. We seek to define ourselves for our own understanding and so that we can move forward in whatever it is that we are 4. Humans often seek to define themselves in terms of their abilities, their relationships with spouse, children, or family, their careers, or their interests 5. But are we really defined by those things? E. Meaning: Why Am I Here? 1. Humans are purposeful creatures: they need to have a purpose for what they are doing 2. Proverbs 29:18 3. Even though we live in an age where many would say that there is no purpose to our existence, few really find that answer satisfying 4. As with identity, so with meaning: people often define their meaning in terms of what they do for others, what they are to others, or by the attempt to fulfill various desires F. Therefore, when it is said that people are trying to "find themselves," they are seeking after their identities and their meaning III. The Problem With "Finding Yourself" A. It would seem that the pursuit of understanding identity and meaning would be beneficial and profitable! B. It could be, perhaps, but there is a major problem with the way humans try to "find themselves" C. They keep looking in the wrong places! D. Where do people try to find identity and meaning? 1. Through doing things: work, career, obtaining money, buying resources 2. Through relationships: family, spouse, children, friends, community 3. Through desires: sex, drugs, entertainment E. Do these things really identify us? Do they really provide purpose in life? 1. Are we not more than what we do? 2. Are we not more than what we are to others? 3. Are we not more than the sum of our physical desires? F. Seeking to find identity and meaning in these is really idolatry! 1. A good definition of sin is humanity trying to take the good and make it the ultimate 2. After all, God made the creation, and it was good (Genesis 1:31) 3. But humans, not perceiving God beyond the creation, began to worship the creation, making it the ultimate: and was condemned (Romans 1:21-25) 4. Humans do a similar thing today: they take good things that God has created, and turn them into objects of veneration: idols! G. Let us consider this in more detail 1. We can do many things, but we can never do enough: there is always more money to be made, more people to be helped, and so on and so forth 2. People who have a lot of money are not necessarily happier because of it! 3. Family is great, marriage can be wonderful, and children can be a source of great joy, but when we look to them to define us or provide us meaning, they will never live up to the ideal we need 4. We can find great comfort in our relationships, but none of them will completely satisfy! 5. We can find enjoyment in sex in its proper sphere, and there is value in escaping occasionally in entertainment, but neither of these things is really the greatest things there are to life! H. Any idol we set up to define us or to give us meaning will ultimately fail: we still have a hole that is not being filled! IV. Where We Find Identity and Meaning A. Should we despair of ever finding identity and meaning? Will we never "find ourselves"? B. By no means! The issue is not that there is no identity or meaning, but that people look in the wrong places for them! C. We have identity and we have meaning! D. We find our identities and we find our meaning when we turn to the Ultimate: God 1. After all, it is in Him that we live and move and have our being (Acts 17:28) 2. He is the true Ultimate, God Almighty, and there is no other beside Him (Exodus 20:2-3) E. After all, the reason for our search is our separation from God 1. When God made man and woman in the Garden, it was very good, and man was complete (Genesis 2) 2. When man sinned and separated himself from God, a hole opened up within him: he acutely felt his separation from his Creator (Isaiah 59:1-2) 3. Ever since, we have sought out how to fill that hole 4. We can look and look and look, but we will only have that hole filled when we return to association with God, for He alone can fill that void (1 John 1:1-4) F. The Bible makes our overall identities understandable! 1. We are God's creation, made in His image (Genesis 1:26-28) 2. We must define ourselves in terms of God, just as men of old did! 3. Consider the kings of Israel and Judah: no matter how successful or terrible they were in political or economic matters, they are known in the Bible for whether they served God or not (e.g. 1 Kings 17:25-34, 2 Kings 18:1-6) 4. How do Paul or James identify themselves? Servants of God (Philippians 1:1, James 1:1) 5. When we primarily identify ourselves according to our relationship with God, everything else will fall into place! G. The Bible also provides us with an idea of our meaning 1. God has a purpose for His people! 2. Acts 17:26-27: man was made to seek after God 3. Ephesians 2:10: we are His workmanship to do good works that He has prepared beforehand for us 4. Luke 17:7-10: we are as servants, doing our duty when we do His will 5. Our meaning, then, is to fulfill God's intentions for mankind! 6. To do good works as His workmanship, serving others, following after the example of Christ (ibid.; cf. also 1 John 2:6) H. Hence, Matthew 6:33! I. When God has His place, everything else falls into place 1. We will look at work as a way of providing for necessities (1 Timothy 5:8) and to help those in need (Ephesians 4:28): use them for the Ultimate purpose, not as an end to themselves 2. We will properly view relationships with others, serving spouses as Christ loved the church, raising our children in the Lord's admonition, and being encouraged by and encouraging our family (Ephesians 5:22-6:4) 3. We will recognize that sex is for the husband and wife to be one flesh, that entertainment can provide some relaxation and rest, so that we can be refreshed and keep busy in the Lord's Kingdom (Matthew 19:4-6) 4. When all of these things are freed from the burden of being the Ultimate, we can value them and be satisfied with them in their roles! 5. And when we seek God and His Kingdom, we will have our yearning for the Ultimate satisfied in Him (Matthew 5:6) V. Personal Identity and Meaning A. But what about each of us as individuals? Do we have specific identities and meaning? B. Yes: we are each individually creations of God and have our own abilities and roles (Romans 12:3-8, 1 Corinthians 12:12-28, 1 Peter 4:10-11) C. We must investigate ourselves and establish what our talents are so that we can be the best servants of God we can be! D. Notice the contrast! 1. In self-help, "finding yourself" is some attempt to discover things about yourself for yourself 2. According to the Bible, we learn to recognize our place in the Body of Christ so that we can serve Him and others in Him! E. We must discover our talents and put them to use in God's Kingdom, and we will find our personal identity and meaning in Him! F. After all, do we not seek after love (1 Corinthians 13)? 1. We all want to be loved and to love, right? 2. God has loved us and loves us (Romans 5:8, 1 John 4:7-21) 3. When we serve others, we indicate our love for them 4. When we surround ourselves with people who love as Christ loved, we will be loved by them also (1 Corinthians 12:12-27)! G. And then we shall find the satisfaction that so few find: complete satisfaction with who we are and why we are here! VI. Conclusion A. The self-help fad of finding ourselves could be a beneficial thing... B. ...when we recognize where we should be looking! C. Identity and meaning can never be found in good things, but only in the Ultimate: in God D. When we are defined as a servant of God in association with Him, and our purpose is to do the will of He who created us, we will be satisfied E. Everything else will fall into place when we put God and His Kingdom first! F. Let us recognize our true identities and purpose, and serve God! G. Invitation/songbook Scripture, Meditation, and Application 1: ...ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth (2 Timothy 3:7). Many these days seek to "find themselves." Our problem is that we look to "find ourselves" in all the wrong places and only for personal edification. 2: For that they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshipped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen (Romans 1:25). Too many seek to find identity and meaning in the things of this earth. They try to make good things The Good, the Ultimate. Such is idolatry, and does not really satisfy our deepest needs! 3: "...that [all people of all nations] should seek God, if haply they might feel after him and find him, though he is not far from each one of us" (Acts 17:27). We are made to seek after fulfillment and satisfaction but can only truly find it in God and His purposes in Jesus Christ. Let us "find ourselves" in God in Christ, made in His image, as part of His family! 4: "But seek ye first his kingdom, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you" (Matthew 6:33). When God is the God of our lives, and we find our purpose and meaning in Him, our service to God informs and saturates how we relate to others and live our lives. Let us seek God's Kingdom and righteousness first, and allow all other relationships and activities to fall into their proper place!